What is the difference between my way and God’s way of meeting needs and fulfilling desires? Why is God’s way the best for us?
My Way in the Story of Naaman
In the story of the Syrian Naaman in 2 Kings, chapter 5, we can clearly see the difference between my way and God’s way. Naaman, a great and honored commander of the army has leprosy. He desires and needs healing. That’s why Naaman goes to the prophet Elisha in Samaria. However, the prophet does not come to meet and greet him. Instead, he just sends his instructions. According to them, Naaman shall go and wash seven times in the Jordan River.
What do you think is Naaman’s reaction? Would he gratefully accept this way to healing and run to the Jordan River? Unfortunately not. He is deeply angry and disappointed. Here are his words: “I thought that he would surely come out to me and stand and call on the name of the Lord his God, wave his hand over the spot and cure me of my leprosy.” (2 Kings 5:11)
This response shows us that Naaman has had fixed expectations about how he would be healed. Therefore, when reality did not meet his expectations, he reacted with anger and disappointment. What’s more, he was even ready to give up on his healing and go home.
My Way – Desires, Needs, and Rights
Naaman’s reaction is a typical expression of a way of thinking and living that we can call “my way”. My way is an expression and continuation of the ego, the aspiration to get my will done. Its foundations and roots are in pride. My way is a means of self-realization, self-sufficiency, and self-provision. It starts from the self and ends with the self.
My way is driven by our expectations, desires, needs, and rights. Here is what the Bible says about this: “You desire but do not have… You do not have because you do not ask God. When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.” (James 4:2-3)
It is important to understand that the majority of our expectations, desires, and so-called rights are not needs. God did not promise us the fulfillment of desires, nor did He guarantee our rights, that is, what we think we deserve. God promises that in Christ He satisfies the true needs and longings of the heart. These are the needs of unconditional love, acceptance, safety, security, value and significance, life, peace, joy, meaning, and purpose. When we look for other ways to satisfy these primary needs, including by fulfilling certain desires, we enter the “my way” mode. However, our true happiness and satisfaction do not depend on the fulfillment of what we want, or what we think we deserve.
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Why God Doesn’t Guarantee the Fulfillment of Our Desires
There are several main reasons for this:
- Many of our desires stem from the lust of the flesh, the desire of the eyes and the vanity (pride) of life. The purpose of these desires is to have one’s own pleasure, glory, and satisfaction.
- To humble us and help us see the reality about ourselves. The truth is that we are limited beings who have no control over the world, nor can we guarantee the fulfillment of our wishes. Recognizing this truth is, on the one hand, a key to healing anger and disappointment directed at oneself, and on the other hand, it helps us release control.
- To help us turn our attention to God as the true controller and sovereign ruler of everything and His unlimited abilities. To direct us to God’s way of living our lives through faith and trust in Him.
- Because God knows that the fulfillment of our desires will bring us only temporary satisfaction and can even separate us from Him as the true source of lasting contentment and satisfaction.
- The fifth reason is the state of the world we are currently living in. It does not correspond to the original godly design. But one day that will change. God guides human history to the new heavens and the new earth.
God’s way
God’s way is the best for us
not only for the moment
but also for eternity.
Does that mean that God does not fulfill our desires at all? Not at all. He does, but as God, He claims for Himself the right to judge what, how, when, and in what form. He alone can do it best because he has unlimited knowledge, wisdom, and strength. And above all, unlimited, everlasting, and unchangeable love for us.
God’s way is always to do what is best for us not only temporarily but also for eternity. God’s way is not limited simply to the satisfaction of desires, it always contains a blessing with an eternal component. In this way, He changes us, humbles us, brings us peace, orientates us towards Him, and makes us His worshippers. In short, God’s way kills our self-centeredness and glorifies Him.
God’s Way – the Choice of Naaman
However, Naaman’s servants managed to persuade him to carry out the prophet’s instructions, despite their simplicity and the lack of instant miracle and fanfare. Naaman’s flesh was restored and he became clean. But not only his body had been renewed – he came out of the Jordan River with a new heart. A heart that had experienced the greatness and power of the true God and wanted to worship Him alone. A heart filled with peace, joy, and new life by accepting God’s way.
The Path from My Way to God’s Way
God is a Giver and Satisfier. He wants to give us much more than what we want or imagine. Therefore, in His intention to bless us, He even changes our desires:
- By teaching us to direct our thoughts to Him. He knows that we start to long for the things we stare at and linger on. When our focus is on God and His things, we begin to want Him more and more.
- By allowing periods of brokenness so we can understand what really moves us. Then the answer to the questions “What am I afraid of? Which are the things I want? What do I need and what do I deserve? “, pop up with crystal clarity. Brokenness is God’s test of our hearts.
- By teaching us to redirect our desires, our needs, and our rights with God’s Word. To submit them under His control and care. Thus, we release ourselves from the need to control people, things, and circumstances to get what we want.
More Encouragement for You
If you need more resources and encouragement to strengthen your faith and help you trust God with your desires and needs, I highly recommend these books. Check them out.
Draw Near: How Painful Experiences Become the Birthplace of Blessings by Hadassah Treu
Mining for God’s Gold in Life’s Dark Valleys by Margaret E. Head
Before You Quit: Everyday Endurance, Moral Courage, and the Quest for Purpose by Doug Gehman
Trusting God in All the Things: 90 Devotions for Finding Peace in Your Every Day by Karen Ehman and Ruth Schwenk
Women of Courage: A 40-Day Devotional by (In)Courage
Make Up Your Mind: Unlock Your Thoughts, Transform Your Life by Denise Dubois Pass and Michelle Nietert
Transforming Your Thought Life by Sarah Geringer
Life Can Be Good Again by Lisa Appelo
It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way by Lisa Terkeurst
This page contains affiliate links, which means I make a small commission at no extra cost to you. The commission I make from these items will help keep this blog going. Thank you!
Your Turn
In what areas of your life can you recognize “your way”? Which desires, expectations, and rights do you consider as needs? I would be happy if you share your opinion in the comments below.
God's way is to do the best for us not only for the moment but to bless us for eternity. #God #Faith #ChristianLiving #Bible #BibleStudy Share on X In His intention to bless us God even changes our desires by allowing periods of brokenness and by teaching us to submit our desires, needs, and rights to Him. #Faith #God #Bible #SpiritualGrowth #BibleTeaching Share on XI send my newsletter “Keep the Faith” every two weeks. I share with you first the newest blog post, recommended books and articles, and the newest freebies and resources to keep the faith.
I saw these words on a tee shirt someone was wearing at the gym..NOT MY WAY! GOD’S WILL! It woke me up!!! I know God is using me in an Epic way, to help wake up the World! I get impatient waiting for him to do something? I now realize, that I need to leave it all in his hands!!! Please check out ACCEPTANCE on youtube..also , STAND UP FOR GOD!!! and WEE WILL RECOVER!!
I hope you are Blessed by my songs!!! Peace!
Thanks for sharing, John! Yes, we need to trust God and let Him be God. It is great that you can serve God through your songs!
This is so true! His ways are so much better than anything I could ever plan. I just have to trust Him. Thanks for the reminder and for linking up at InstaEncouragements.
Thanks a lot for your comment, Patsy! Yes, trusting God is the key. It was my pleasure to link up at InstaEncouragements! it is a great platform and I love the idea of mutual support and encouragement!
We just talked about this story at church a few weeks ago and I had never thought about how negatively our expectations can influence our actions and words. I loved your insight about our way vs God’s way! Thanks for sharing!
Thank you so much, Pamela! The topic of expectations and faith is very present in my life. Sometimes expectations can become an idol and hinder us to discern and accept the provision of God. The next post are devoted to different aspects of this topic and I hope they can bring some insights and practical help.
Great post! It is easy to come to God with fixed expectations like Naaman did, instead of being open to his way, but God’s way is definitely best even if it is different from ours!
Thank you so much for your kind words, Lesley! Our expectations, assumptions and presumptions are very often standing in the way of recognizing and receiving the provision God has for us. We need really to learn how to deal with them in a godly way.