The overcoming of destructive mindsets and perceptions is completely possible. The starting point is the identification of the trauma that has not been properly dealt with and healed. In this way, it has served as an entry point misconceptions and personality distortions.
The greatest Healer and Psychotherapist
„..when anyone being aware of their afflictions and pains, spreading out their hands toward Your temple, then hear from heaven, Your dwelling place. Forgive, …since you know their hearts (for you alone know the human heart)..“ (2 Chronicles 2:29-30)
The Spirit of God is the greatest understander of the human heart. He knows our hearts completely with all their wounds, pains, strongholds, and hidden things. God is the one who can bring the hidden from the darkness if we truly desire this and allow Him to do it. He can lead us on the path of healing and transformation. God is the greatest master-psychotherapist, the greatest healer of the human heart and mind.
Overcoming destructive mindsets – the beginning
The first step is to go to God requesting Him to make our wounds known to us and asking for His guidance. It is important to have a person whom we can trust to accompany us – a friend, a counselor.
The process starts with the identification and acknowledgment of the specific trauma with all its consequences in our lives. For example experienced violence, misuse, rejection, humiliation, loss and so on or being the one who has inflicted such. This is the step of confrontation, facing the pain of the experience and the whole range of feelings. At this stage, the stress and the pain are much more intense than at the time of the traumatic experience itself.
The purpose of the confrontation is TOGETHER WITH GOD to open this closed door and see in the light the monster hiding in the dark. Then we are able to accept the consolation und understanding from God and to close forever the door to this experience. In this way, the impact of trauma as a source of distortion and blocking element in life is stopped. This step takes time because things have to be dealt with in detail. So there is nothing left in the dark to continue to raise questions and doubts.
The next two steps in overcoming destructive mindsets
An important part of the confrontation is the firm decision for processing the experience and for overcoming. This is inevitably connected with the issue of forgiveness. Accepting forgiveness from God for the hurt we have inflicted and giving forgiveness in our hearts to those who have hurt us. Christ’s cross is the basis for giving and accepting forgiveness without compromising God’s justice. Remember that God is a righteous Judge and the One, Who vindicates. When we forgive, we give up the role of judges and avengers (for which we are not qualified anyway) and we leave this function and role to God.
An irrevocable part of the overcoming of the trauma and its consequences is the process of emotional healing. It can take time but through the Spirit of God, we can get complete healing of the painful memories. God gives us a wonderful promise in Job 11:16: „You will surely forget your trouble, recalling it only as waters gone by.”
Exchanging the lies for the truth
This includes identifying the lie(s) that the trauma has brought in all possible aspects. This step begins in the process of confrontation in the trauma. God begins to show us situations and our reactions and patterns of behavior, specifically influenced by the thinking resulting from the trauma. To a great extent, these lies serve as defensive mechanisms designed to save us future pain. At the same time, however, they block us and prevent us from taking responsibility and managing our lives.
The next step is rejecting the specific destructive thinking pattern related to the specific trauma. This is followed by replacing it with beliefs and convictions based on the truth. This is the process of renewing the mind in the light of God’s Word. Especially key are our views on the personality and character of God, ourselves as God’s children, our value, our goals and future, and others.
The last step – embrace life and your new identity
We need to make a daily choice to embrace life. This involves taking steps of trust and faith in God, ourselves and the people.
The most important thing that we need to remember all the time is that we are not the product of our past or of other people or of the circumstances, but of Christ’s cross and of God’s restorative and transformational work. Our core identity is determined by our relationship with the eternal God, by His choice and calling. That’s why “If you devote your heart to Him and stretch out your hands to Him, if you put away the sin that is in your hand and allow no evil to dwell in your tent, then, free of fault, you will lift up your face; you will stand firm and without fear.” (Job 11:13-15)
Can you identify which patterns of thinking are harming you? Can you trace them to a certain trauma? Do you want to walk along with these steps of healing and change? Come and share your thoughts in the comments!